Absolutely Fabulous?

Remember the old philosophical question that goes (roughly) like this: “If a tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it, does it still make a sound?” Or maybe you are more familiar with a recent, cheeky version, which goes: ”If a man says something and no woman hears him, is he still wrong?”

Well, I have been postulating about a little query of my own.

If you do something fabulous and no one is there to admire it, is it still fabulous?

This leads me to today’s discussion. I have been thinking a lot about the social nature of humankind. Yes, I know that’s pretty deep coming from someone who generally prefers to explore the social nature of drinks on the verandah, but I thought I would give it a whirl.

You see, I have been reading an interesting book which discusses the human propensity for identifying with our egos as opposed to identifying with our essential selves. It claims that it is our ego which encourages us to compete, make war, revere money, achieve success and avoid fattening desserts and that this is ….well, basically ….. what is wrong with us as a species. Instead of honouring our true spirits we are too busy honouring our egotistical notions and wrecking the world with selfishness and greed in the process.

Hmmm. Sounds bad. And complex isn’t it? I do apologise if you are reading this over brekky. Philosophical discussions of this kind should be reserved for later in the day when one has a nice glass of red and a fellow philosopher on hand to chew the fat with. Which leads me (rather nicely - if my ego does say, itself!) back to where I was heading with this piece in the first place; the social nature of humankind.

I have always presumed (in, admittedly, an ill-thought-through kind of way) that people who are ‘social’ are also naturally helpful, giving and benevolent. Well, it seems like a sensible enough assumption, doesn’t it? People who are people-people do tend to get along with and do good things for other people. Therefore, what’s so wrong with that thinking?

On the face of it, it does seem fair enough. But at a deeper level, it leads one to speculate if ‘social people’ merely gravitate to others as a means of boosting their own egos. Do they choose their friends according to the likelihood of the friends nurturing their own egos with compliments and admiration? I suspect there may be some truth in that.

After all, I’m sure most of us don’t hunt around for a friend that will drain our emotional and financial resources and constantly find new and innovative ways to treat us badly. No. Besides the fact that many of us gave birth to people who will do that for free, we do tend to align ourselves with people who treat us with love, humour and compassion.

But do we also tend to find friends that highlight our ‘good points’? Do we subconsciously look for people who are dumber, fatter, broker, blotchier, wrinklier, worse at maths or grumpier than us just so we can compare ourselves -- favourably of course -- against these Human Benchmarks? Are our ‘good deeds’ really for the benefit of others, or is there an element of ‘this makes me look/feel good’? Would there be any point in being nice or achieving fabulous things if nobody actually noticed?

Well, like any typical wishy-washy philosopher, I have no definitive answer. That’s not my job remember! Philosophers just ask the questions then walk away, casually twirling their rope belts, while you anguish over their postulations for many years to come. That’s what we do!

So, like my philosophical forebears, I will leave you to think about this one.
And I do hope you think this has been a fabulously interesting article and that you are sitting there admiring my wit and insights. Not that my essential self really cares, of course.

……Much!